Dream - 2

Another fragment of a dream last night. Might be work-related...I'm not sure.

I was a demon-hunter. That is, I was hired by some shadowy person or thing to hunt demons in this world. Before I could do that though, I had to go through what seemed like endless interviews, examinations, discussions, talks, guidance counselors and personality tests.

The place where all this took place was cloaked in greys and browns, dim and hazy. Very difficult to see who had hired me or was asking questions.

As I went through these interminable steps I started wondering if the demon I was hunting was me. Then, just before I woke up, I had the intense feeling that these demons were a lot smarter than I had given them credit for and might have been before my eyes the whole time.

Footsteps

I have been reading Karen Armstrong's The Spiral Staircase this month and last and have enjoyed it immensely.

It is an autobiography of Ms. Armstrong's life as a Nun and after she left the convent. Her writing is elegant yet clear and precise and she doesn't shirk from personal responsibility.

Even though I am not familiar with catholic religious orders, I have a deep interest in spiritual callings and Armstrong clearly describes her life with this in mind. She shows us that some searches are universal no matter what name we give them. Highly recommended.

Some quotes:

"I needed to escape into other people's books and minds, because when left entirely to own devices, I found that I had nothing to say." Page 31. An experience that I fight every day.

"...the ability to experience pain and sorrow is the sine qua non of enlightenment..." Page 263. Add forgiveness to the equation and you have a key.

"We are...most fully ourselves when we give ourselves away, and it is egotism that holds us back from the transcendent experience that has been called God, Nirvana, Brahma or the Tao." Page 279. A paradox. And a concept that most of us are afraid to try.

And my favourite sentence:

"You have to be prepared to extend your compassionate interest when there is no hope of return." Page 299. This is an important point where most of us fall down. If we humans, followers of various gods and deities, would be able to follow these simple words, we would then surely follow in the footsteps of the great prophets and redeemers of history and myth.

Fallen

Now you're probably saying shit, this blog's fallen to amateurish poetry in place of content. Well you're right. It's an attempt, much like the haiku earlier, to display another side of me in an attempt to get to the core. I make no apologies and you should ridicule me to your hearts content if you wish. This is also an attempt, for those who look closely, at self-effacement and misdirection. If they laugh and I laugh with them, maybe they'll forget I'm being heartfelt.

one of those days

we have the shutters
closed tightly,
it’s one of those days.
no amount of light
must be let through.
the cat will be yelled at,
the bed will be left
unmade,
it’s one of those days.
we won’t speak to
each other much,
only in grunts and sighs,
it’s one of those days.
every blemish will be an
excuse for anger
and the cat will go
to its secret hiding place
for a few hours
but we will be left
to face each other,
it’s another one of those days.

The Weight

Spirituality (mythos) is concerned with meaning.

Fact (logos) is concerned with functioning.

Both are needed in today's world where functioning has no meaning and thus atrocities, both little and large, are committed daily.

A Perfect Way

There simply must be a better way.

A Face From the Ancient Gallery

We are more than just one person. We contain multitudes and display the different faces depending on the situation.

The key is to get down to the essence, the core, the final one personality.

As scary as that might be.

The Work Life

The work life.

Discuss, count to ten, discuss, count to ten, discuss, decide, justify, discuss, count to ten, clarify, discuss, count to ten, discuss, discuss, count to ten, discuss, decide, justify, count to ten, start over.

Effort-less

Not much to say today. It was one of those days where you just can't get anything going. You then need to stop and think about why...but it's too much effort.

Good Times, Bad Times

What's the old saying; stop the world I want to get off?

Reading the newspaper every morning I realize now puts me in quite a horrid mood. Here I am trying to start the day and seeing only bad or worse headlines with my breakfast cereal. My son recently had to do a project for school where he had to look at the newspaper and find one good/inspiring story and one bad/disaster type story and contrast them (where they were placed in the paper, the tone of the news etc.) We were very hard pressed to find any "good" stories.

I am going to try to stop reading the paper in the mornings (except for the comics) to see if it makes my outlook any brighter. It may be seen as closing my eyes to the suffering in the world, but I find I am almost hungering after these types of stories. I am like those spectators at car accidents, unwilling to leave the scene. Once the bizarre need to see these stories lessens, as I don't think it totally disappears, then I'll start up again

Working Man

Working too hard sometimes has the unintentional effect of turning a person into two people. The work person who is steady, dependable, always smiling and "gets things done" and the other person who goes home and opens and closes the fridge door seventeen times looking for the same item.

The Finer Things

A bottle of wine, good food, superior friends with excellent conversation and the children occupying themselves. Paradise.

Sit and Write

One of the most difficult aspects of this blog has been to actually write anything that may be of interest to anyone. It sometimes takes a while to get the engine running and often it just splutters and fails.

In order to kick-start the writing I went back and re-visited the aims I had when initially starting this space and I realized that I don't have to actually write anything interesting at all...and I certainly don't have to write something that may interest someone out there (assuming there is anyone out there).

I just have to sit and write.

So here you go.

Political Movement - Part 2

Yesterday's title to the post I made not only came from within the posting but from travelling the blogoshpere and seeing how many political writings there are out there.

It seems to me that they're only preaching to the converted or talking to themselves, and so the mis-interpretation goes on.

Political Movement

The internal politics of a large company is an awesome sight to behold. Just don't get caught in the way.

The Four G's

I used to work in a job that involved dealing with the public in a very public place.

All sorts of people would approach me for assistance and many would tell me their stories.

An elderly black man once came up to me and asked me a question.

"Do you know the secret to success in life" he asked.

I should have said yes and hoped for him to move on but I replied in the negative.

He said "Four words. Guts, guile, gall and glamour."

Then he smiled and walked away.

Fault Lines

There is an axiom that says what we find most at fault in others is the fault we actually see (or don't yet see) in ourselves. I would add that sometimes we also find fault in others due to something we lack in ourselves.

How then to stop finding fault in others:

1 - acknowledgment - there is an issue
2 - allowance - this is my issue
3 - revealing - this is the issue
4 - understanding - this is why I have the issue
5 - letting go - this is what I can do about the issue

Take her for a spin, let me know how she handles.

The Supreme Humourist

Of course, ever since I complained about dreaming too much I can't recall any of the myriad number of dreams I've had.

Methinks there is a presence in the universe with a very unique sense of humour.

The Last Page

And sometimes when I've stared at the computer screen much too long, I click here.

Us and Them

The kids tested my/their limits today. Multiple times. In fact they blew right past the limits and headed into interstellar space.

It's quite amazing how we can allow someone so pint-sized to rule our emotional condition. I mean, here we are, experienced adults, with stressful working lives that don't cause us to lose control as much as when a tiny miniature us pushes the right button. Suddenly all the strategies go out the window and we become them.

I know, I know, it's just part of growing up.